Get to Know Your Divorce Coach~Heidi

My greatest hope is to provide you with some information and resources to help guide you through this difficult crossroad in your life.  No one sets out to get a divorce.  I know this first hand as a divorced mother of three,  now-adult children.  Unfortunately, when their father and I separated and ultimately divorced two years later, my children were only in grammar and middle school.  I wish the options and resources that now exist had been more accessible to me back then.  I remember feeling so overwhelmed, alone, and scared.  My friends and family members all meant well, but their advice, opinions, and sometimes judgment were often contradictory and just added to my confusion and uncertainty.  My divorce experience would have been a lot less tumultuous and scary if I had a trained professional in my corner who was truly only vested in my best interest and those of my children.  Despite having years of professional experience working with children and their families when it came time for me to deal with this crossroad in life,  I struggled.  I felt shame and embarrassment that I hadn't been able to "save" my marriage despite all my training.  I encounter tons of fear and uncertainty around finances and future planning.  The worst part though was the emotional rollercoaster of hurt, disappointment, resentment, and shame.  These were all compounded by struggles with how to navigate my own family and my now "ex"-inlaw family members.  It took me a few years to really regroup, heal and move forward in a positive direction.  All the while trying to keep my children's needs and interests at the forefront.  This required establishing healthy boundaries with both sides of our families, ensuring that my children had a positive relationship and access to their father.  The most challenging part was re-creating a new relationship with their father, one where we co-parented our children and had respect and adoration for our individual differences.  It wasn't always easy but I am proud to say we both did the best we could.  Today our family is a modern-day melting pot of the quintessential extended family.  My children have the benefit of having multiple parental figures who support and love them.  Their father and I, and our respective significant others,  share in their life achievements and special moments-birthdays, graduations, sporting events, etc.  Our focus and purpose are on that which we share-our children.  This is what I hope to bring to you through our Divorce Coaching sessions.  With the right tools, coping strategies, and techniques you too can create a new family system that works well for everyone involved.  I truly believe this is possible~where there is a will there is a way!